The I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here rumour mill has begun with widely unknown reality stars already being touted for the top spots. FUBAR have drawn up the ULTIMATE jungle line-up.
The biggest hit from Channel 4’s Gogglebox. Funny, sassy and truthful, what more could you need? You wouldn’t have to worry about anyone lying, Scarlett would happily call bullshit. Either that, or her face would do the talking.
We know, we know, it’s never going to happen. But let us have our fun! This is our dream team. Mary wouldn’t just be cooking the rice, she’d be up for the challenges no doubt. Don’t get us wrong, she wouldn’t be herding ostriches but Berry is full of banter.
I mean, is he really as good as he says? Will he really drink his own piss? We’ll find out won’t we? Ant and Dec will be on guard with hilarious criticism, no doubt.
Paul ‘Gazza’ Gascoigne
Gazza is always on ITV’s list and has apparently been approached with six-figure sums several times. The problem? It’s obvious. Every contestant takes a mental examination before entering the jungle (We know. How the fuck did Gemma Collins pass that?) and Gazza has far too many demons to be safe in the Australian outback. He’d win it without a doubt and everyone would see his national treasure status restored.
He’s so elusive. Who knows what he will do. One thing we are certain of, is that he will keep the camp entertained. Whether it’s singing around the fire or interpretive dance, Bill Murray would be the most entertaining person to ever enter the jungle.
The guy who cried and kicked up a fuss just one episode into Bear Grylls’ Celebrity Island. We want to give him another chance. Not because we’re nice like that, but we want to see him backflip his way out of this one too!
She’d definitely be one of the favourites to win. She’d take on every challenge and storm every task. Nobody would go hungry if Ennis was on their team. We like to see people win too!
Just imagine the talks in that shack the programme uses as their Big Brother style diary room. They would be really long, deep and meaningful chats to the audience. The talks will either be infuriating or super funny, but we’re willing to take that risk and find out.
Will she take the lamp off her head? We might be in with the chance of seeing the real Sia! We feel she might be a little crazy and cause some tensions within the camp, something we are not averse to. Can’t have a boring jungle experience can we?